Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
