The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
