just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
