Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
