his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
