I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
