I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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