Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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