Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
