I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
