Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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