why didn't you poke me back
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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