you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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