Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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