Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
