I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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