my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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