When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
