sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
