i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
