i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
