How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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