First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
