shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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