so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Randomize