my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Randomize