Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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