She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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