I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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