I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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