She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
