a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
