A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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