You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize