Im at strip club and am horny
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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