you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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