I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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