I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
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