i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
There r osticjed everywhere
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize