I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
