I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
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