Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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