I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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