11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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