I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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