The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
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