just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
