but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
