Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry meghan61893 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(503): View more from Oregon

I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.

Fav 33 3891 1247
share tweet
(801): View more from Utah

let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.

Fav 13 1131 5954
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(240): View more from Maryland

oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times

Fav 12 6849 1285
share tweet
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.

Fav 2 3993 2246
share tweet
(817): View more from Texas

He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round

Fav 18 8621 1351
share tweet
(910): View more from North Carolina

I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers

Fav 16 1438 5544
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(269): View more from Michigan

I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.

Fav 1 907 1559
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(937): View more from Ohio

I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.

Fav 3 200 74
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(217): View more from Illinois

Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.

Fav 0 11 68
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT