Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
third nipple confirmed
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
