is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
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