escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
